Many people think they are being blunt when in reality, they are being just rude, and on the other hand, many people perceive a person that is blunt as being rude.
In this article, I want to talk about what makes people not realize when they are blunt or rude and how to be helpfully blunt rather than rude.
There is a thin line between those two, and it’s pretty easy to step over it, especially because it depends on your circumstances and the relationship between you and the person you are being blunt with.
So what is perceived as being rude by a person it might not be the same for another person, and this complicates a bit the answer to this question.
Is being blunt rude?
Being blunt is not always rude, especially if what you say when you are blunt helps the other person. However, being blunt is often perceived as rude because most people just want to express their opinion without being emphatic and considering how the person in front of them will interpret what they are saying.
Many people brag about how blunt and direct they are because it sounds way more cool compared to saying that you think about what other people might feel about what you say. The reality is that our opinion is not needed as often as we think it is, which makes blunt people rude most of the time.
Does this mean that you don’t have to say what you think?
No, but you have to be more considerate and respectful when you throw it out there since not everybody has to accept your opinion, and you might upset some people for no actual reason.
You don’t have to sugar coat everything you say, but it is important to say it in a way that is perceived as helpful rather than rude.
The intention behind your words can make a huge difference. I notice that many “blunt” people want to show how smart they are and how their advice is very useful rather than thinking about how they can really help the other person. So if you have selfish intentions, like being cool or impressing somebody, you will be perceived as rude no matter how useful your advice is.
Read Also: Is Being A Know-It-All Bad?
How can you be blunt without being rude?
There are a few situations when being blunt, even if you are using a rude tone, is not perceived as being rude.
-When you talk with a close or best friend and they know that you want their best and you know that if you are too diplomatic, they will not take your advice seriously. However, even in this situation, you have to be careful because it matters a lot that your friends will feel that you want their best and that you are not blunt just to look cool or show them how smart you are.
So it does matter if you are blunt with a friend or a stranger to avoid being perceived as rude. When it comes to a person, you barely know you have to be way more diplomatic than with a friend, which is how it is supposed to be. Why would a stranger trust that you want their best when you are being blunt and telling them your opinion?
-Does your opinion matter?
If it doesn’t change or help anything, but you feel like you have to say what you think, you should not be surprised that people consider you being rude rather than appreciating your honesty.
Some people hide behind the fact that they are direct/blunt when someone gets upset, but they don’t take responsibility for the fact that it wasn’t the right tone, moment, or person to be blunt with.
Read Also: Passive Aggressive Vs. Sarcasm
You should not be afraid to say what you think, but at the same time, you have to be aware that there are certain situations when what you have to say doesn’t help anybody, including you, so it might be better not to say it or say it more respectfully and diplomatically.
In some situations, being diplomatic might not help the other person understand your point, and you might have to be a bit blunter. However, the secret here is to be more adaptable and understand that different situations require different ways of expressing yourself.