Is Being Shy Attractive? – 7 Reasons It Seems That Way

From what I know and the research I have done online, people tend to agree that being shy is attractive.

In this article, we will discuss why this is the case and what are the benefits of being shy when it comes to attractiveness.

In this article, we will not talk about how good of a partner is a shy person compared to an outgoing one but rather about what makes a shy person attractive in the first place.

We can’t go into much detail about what being shy actually means because that would be a long article on its own.

is being shy attractive

Is being shy attractive?

Shy people seem to be more approachable, cute, modest, and non-threatening, which can be attractive. Does this mean they are a good partner and will like you?

No, it is more about appearances, but appearance matters when we talk about attractiveness.

What we are attracted to differs from one person to another, some might like an outgoing person because it seems that they know what they want in life, and some might like a shy person because they like to have someone that seems to need their protection.

You will notice that the word “seem” will be very often used in this article because, often, shy people seem to be more trustworthy, less talkative, better listeners, and so on. That doesn’t mean they actually are when you get to know them better.

But how they seem is very important when it comes to how attractive people consider them, so it doesn’t matter if they are not that way to be attractive to someone who might like a shy person.

When it comes to shy people being more attractive, sometimes it is for good reasons because there are some good reasons we will talk about in this article. However, many people tend to prefer and be attracted to shy people from a lack of confidence and low self-esteem because one of the biggest reasons shy people are more attractive is that they seem to be more approachable, thus an easy win. It can be quite frightening to approach a more outgoing person, I’m not talking about obnoxious ones, but the ones that know what they want and are go-getters.

Read Also: Is Shyness A Weakness?

7 Reasons why shy people are attractive

Those are some of the reasons why we tend to find shy people more attractive.

1. They make you feel on the same level as them or possibly superior.

Whether you feel superior or not to a shy person depends on the circumstances, but one thing is for sure, rarely do they make you feel inferior.

Most people like this, but the truth is that things might change when you get to know each other, and the shy person starts to open up to you and say what they think.

2. It can be cute

Being shy is cute, and most of us are attracted to cuteness, so I perfectly understand why we see shy people as attractive. It is hard to say that an outgoing person is cute, they might be in certain situations, but less often than a shy person which is cute only with their presence and innocent smile and nervousness. It might not be a good quality in more serious circumstances, but it is more attractive.

3. Shy people seem to be more modest and humble

In a society where many people tend to exaggerate things to capture the attention of others, someone being more humble and modest can be very comforting and non-threatening, which might make them more attractive.

Read Also: Is Being Quiet Attractive?

4. It is relaxing to be around a shy person

Being around shy people is calming and relaxing, and they make you feel like there is no rush to do anything.

So not having to be tense and feeling the need to impress is great since it will make you more honest and easier to open up.

5. Good listeners

Shy people are better listeners than others because they don’t feel the need to talk that much to impress others around them. 

This might change when you get to know each other better because they will start to talk more when they feel safe. But for sure, it will not happen in the beginning, so this might be why we are attracted to shy people.

6. Seem more trustworthy

The fact that a person is shy doesn’t actually mean that they are trustworthy, but it seems this way, especially because they don’t want to impress others as much. However, a person that talks a lot, and wants to impress others might share with others something that they should not share by mistake, this risk is less likely when it comes to a shy person.

If a shy person ends up sharing something about you that you had the trust to tell them, you know for sure that it was on purpose, not by mistake.

However, they seem more trustworthy non the less.

7. Mysterious

When it comes to shy people, we like that they are more mysterious, and you feel like it is an achievement when you really get to know them, which can be very attractive. It might be annoying for a person that lacks patience, but that’s why everybody has their own preferences.

Also, the mysterious part can go both ways, you might like or not like what you find out. But the mysterious aspect is attractive anyway.

Read Also: Should You Text A Girl You Like Every Day?


We are attracted to how shy people seem to be, it might end up that they actually are that way or not, but they are attractive in the first place for most people.

Also, someone being shy means that they might have strong feelings about something, if they are shy when they are around you is easy to understand that they are attracted by you, which is cute.

If that is the case or not varies from case to case, they might just be overwhelmed but not attracted.